let me see what spring is like on Jupiter and Mars

[kleenexwoman]

Got back about 5:30 this morning. I haven't slept for a couple days. Wish I could go back and sit shiva with everyone else, but school does not stop for shiva.
For those who are not aware: Sitting shiva is a Jewish mourning tradition that lasts seven days, hence the name: "sheva" or "shiva" (depending on how you transliterate the letters) is Hebrew for "seven." The immediate family is not allowed to cook, clean, wash, shave, have sex, wear hard shoes in the house, or do much of anything for a week while they mourn. Since we are Reform (read: practically goyim), most of this was completely disregarded.
The funeral was...funereal, I guess. I got to stand in a recieving line and be consoled at by relatives I've never met. Also, what do you say the 100th time somebody you don't know says "I'm sorry for your loss?" Mumbled "Thank you" seems to suffice, but it's a great temptation to say something semi-sarcastic like "Yeah, well so am I." (This would have gotten horrified looks from relatives that I do not particularly want to get horrified looks from, so I bit my tongue and submitted to blue-haired old lady hugs.)
A lot of people were there. The funeral home was packed. Apparently Grandpa Harold was much more popular than I thought. The funeral procession stretched for about a mile, and I don't think I'm exaggerating.

Good thing was that I got to see my family for a couple days, which I enjoy even at the worst of times. My Aunt Maureen has declared her intention to take me to get a tattoo for my nineteenth birthday. I'm still trying to decide on a design.
Also, Grandma Debbie gave me Grandpa's copy of "Nightmares and Dreamscapes," which is usually what I read when I need to hide during holiday parties. She said she thought he would have wanted me to have it.

I'm quite tired and am starting to make typos. I need sleep. You are allowed to sleep during shiva, but most people really don't.

Comments

[drworm.livejournal.com]

Also, what do you say the 100th time somebody you don't know says "I'm sorry for your loss?"

This is precisely the reason why I haven't said anything yet. Just so you know... I am thinking about you, but I don't know what to say, and whatever I do say will sound cliche and ham-handed and you've likely heard it a thousand times already.

Actually, I'm taking one of my rats to be put to sleep tomorrow. I'm thinking about him, then thinking about you, and feeling kind of stupid for my comparatively small loss. Um... yes. I really am sorry, though.

[kleenexwoman.livejournal.com]

Thank you. It's very kind of you to say so, and it does mean a lot to me.

And...I'm sorry to hear about your rat. (Yeah, I don't know what to say either, obviously...)

Glad you're home, sweetness...

[wolf-heart9.livejournal.com]

...and get some good sleep. You need it. Funerals usually can't be anything more than funereal and to be honest, I always wanted to hit people with pies after the eleventy-hundredth "I'm sorry." I mean, it's all people know how to say because what else can you say? With my parents, I wasn't really sorry either was gone because they were both extremely sick, so it was the case of them being in a better place than horrid pain. But it's not easy to tell traditionalist relatives and well-wishers, "Well, I'm not sorry he/she/they're gone because they're out of pain." They just don't quite get it.

You take care and make sure you eat something. Let me know what type of tat designs you're wanting and I'll see what art I can find for you to peruse.

*big huggles*

[chime9821.livejournal.com]

When I was an immediate family member to the deceased, people kept approaching me at the wake and saying, "She's in a better place now."

I just wanted to scream back something along the lines of, "You're so right about that. Not in this shithole like me surrounded by assholes like you."

But yea...not exactly appropriate. I feel your pain.