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Shat out a fic about aliens. Fanfiction: The anti-drug. Or, no, actually a drug. Wasn't there a story about how science fiction was a drug? If I recall, it also compared the Spanish conquistadors to alien invaders and had a lot to do with both gold and cocaine. Not in a flashy pimpy way, in a really depressing way. I like that story. It was in either the Norton Book of Classic Science Fiction Stories or the Oxford one. Edited by Ursula K. Le Guin, I think. Also had a good story called "The Brains Of Rats" that was about a transvestite scientist. And had a Joanna Russ story that I liked. Joanna Russ really appealed to me when I was a middle school feminist.

I have a headache right now and I've been crying for a lot of reasons. Things just build up, and then once every couple of months they go "click" or possibly "bang" and I end up rocking back and forth in the hallway at 2 AM crying to someone who I really shouldn't be bothering at that hour.
I had a really long rant written out about how people are starting to like me and how they really shouldn't because the only reason I get them to like me is because I don't want the other monkeys to kill me for being useless...look, it made more sense when I was sobbing into my Sociology text. I'll post my Sociological Theory of Monkey Brains sometime later, probably after I talk Sheptoski's ear off with it after class while he's trying to get to his car.

I really wish I could avoid doing stupid shit that upsets people.

And I need to get to bed. But I can't, because Ashley's in there and if I wake her up one more time I'm afraid she'll actually try to kill me. It'll really be my fault anyway. I do all this and it makes her mad. I do things and it makes people mad. Or sad. Or something.
I can't get mad at people, I cringe instead. No matter what. It's usually my fault anyway. Wasn't even Her fault. Couldn't love Her. Couldn't handle knowing that someone cared about me. That's why I really shouldn't have a girlfriend. Kathryn's been flirting with me, I think. Can't tell. Wouldn't be fair to her anyway. Not good at this sort of thing. Obviously.

I don't really want to go to class tomorrow. I'm going to sleep in my clothes and look all disheveled. And I haven't gotten my Econ done either.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-02-08 05:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drworm.livejournal.com
*hugs* Um... I have no idea what's going on, but I'm sorry things are sucking so much.

Things just build up, and then once every couple of months they go "click" or possibly "bang" and I end up rocking back and forth in the hallway at 2 AM crying to someone who I really shouldn't be bothering at that hour.

Ack, I know what that's like. It's not fun in the slightest, but it does get better. If your roommates are jerks, it's not your fault. Things do calm down, eventually.

*hugs again* Um... can't think of what else to say...

(no subject)

Date: 2005-02-08 06:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kleenexwoman.livejournal.com
thank you.

not really all my roommates though. if i told you most of it you'd probably be pissed off at me too.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-02-09 02:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drworm.livejournal.com
At this point I'm mostly just confused. Anyway, I tend not to stay angry. This sounds like there was some kind of misunderstanding or mistake which is nobody's fault.

Damn, I sound diplomatic. It's true, though. Nobody is at fault here. Everyone take a deep breath. Tell me all about it. It's going to be okay.

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kleenexwoman: A caricature of me looking future-y.  (Default)
Rachel

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