(no subject)

[kleenexwoman]

So we just finished watching The Black Cat, which is sort of a biopic of Edgar Allen Poe in the same way that Naked Lunch was a biopic of William S. Burroughs. (IMDB says it was part of a TV series called "Masters of Horror," which explains why it was so weirdly short.)

Jeffrey Combs, who played Poe, was really, really fucking good. Like, better than any role I've seen him in since Herbert West. Very Southern and pompous and drunk and macabre and just total absolute win-at-failing. However, I am posting mainly to express my undoubtedly lasting trauma at the special effects, which, when they did not involve buckets of Karo syrup mixed with red dye--hell, even when they did involve buckets of Karo syrup mixed with red dye--were pretty fuckin' gruesome. Like, "hatchet wound in the middle of the face" gruesome. And then "rotting corpse with a hatchet wound in the middle of the face" gruesome. Like, "Someone in the special effects department went out and found a real hatchet-wound-faced corpse to work off of and then let it sit for a couple days and did it all over again" gruesome.

Also, they grossed out drworm, which almost never happens (because he's a sociopath. Okay, I meant that as a joke, but he's looking over my shoulder and was like, "It's true." And now he's going all Patrick Bateman on me. Oh god. AND HE JUST ASKED ME IF I LIKED HUEY LEWIS AND THE NEWS. GUYS, IF I DON'T POST FOR A FEW DAYS CHECK THE FREEZER, THERE WILL BE MY HEAD, RIGHT NEXT TO THE CHEAP FLAVORED VODKA.)

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[josephwaldman.livejournal.com]

Yes, he was one kinky mofo, by which I mean a Baltimore pervert ahead of his time. And he had a head even bigger than mine.