this poem is a true story.

[at the supermarket]

i was interrogating the jars of salsa
i could not decide which one to buy

i should get this one it has twenty percent of the recommended amount of vitamin c i need but this one has chipotle in it and i like chipotle this one is only a dollar twenty-five this one has a very nicely-shaped jar and this one is mango peach it sounds like it would go good on ice cream if i ever got ice cream should i get ice cream this one has too much sodium in it and this one donates a quarter of its profits to help save struggling farmers in guatemala but also it's three dollars ninety-five oh look this one has vitamin a but also it's probably too hot for me and this one has cheese in it in case i ever run out of cheese

shut up i said to myself
shut up
shut up
shut up