1) as long as we've established these are things people are doing for pay, why would i do any of them for less than $20? that i should even write a story that disturbs me for free (when i could, admittedly, do it with one hand tied behind my back on Notepad) while some other dude is posting n00dz for $100 is an insult! as long as you're paying the other suckers hard cash, you'll fucking pay me!

2) i have the lamest shadow conspiracy D: how about this: my other choice would be legalizing the sale of drugs without legalizing drug dealers!